A Season of Ugly…

I’m going through a season of ugly. You know,  that place where you are not where you use to be, but miles away from where you want to be? That middle ground, the hard stuff – that in between time. Are you familiar with the feeling of frustration because the dots are not connecting? It seems like all odds are against you, and your prayers are bouncing off the roof; has hell has broken loose? That very messy place, where there are more questions than answers?

My world right now doesn’t make sense and although my God promises to never leave me, I don’t hear anything, not even a whisper from Him. He seems so far away, so distant. This is not the place I hear preachers preach about or worship leaders sing about. It is a hard place and I can’t seem to make much sense of it.

This place crushes, it breaks you, it bends the will, it’s dark and dreadfully painful. The words of the scripture that I know so well bounces off me and echoes through the tunnel of my fears and worries that are my present companions. My reality surrounds me, hope and faith escape me. I am left in anguish that my God has not only left me but has abandoned me. I feel what my Lord must have felt when He cried out “Eli Eli lama sabachthani?” which is, “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?” … ( Mark 15:34)

And then it dawned on me, that Jesus understands what I am experiencing. He knows how I feel. He doesn’t want me to band-aid it up, he doesn’t want me to slap a fake smile on, he doesn’t want me to pretend. He wants me to cry out to him in my mess of emotions, completed naked and exposed before him, just as He did before the Father.

My God, my God, why have you forsaken me? Why are you so far from saving me, so far from my cries of anguish? My God, I cry out by day, but you do not answer, by night; I find no rest. ( Psalm 22:1-2)

So here I am, one hot mess before the Lord, confused, frustrated, hurting, crying, completely broken and vulnerable.

And then the Lord reminded me that He didn’t just promise NEVER to leave me but also to NEVER forsake (abandoned or deserted on “a journey into forgotten and forsaken places”.)

Friend, can I tell you I have been experiencing just that in this season, feeling I have been deserted by God on a journey to a forsaken place.

Have you been there? Have you experienced such season?

There is HOPE and good news! Seasons don’t last forever; that’s the thing about seasons, they change and so will your situation or circumstances.

I was reminded that the teacher is usually silent during the test. Believe it or not, you are learning a great deal about yourself and about your God. The truth is He. NEVER. Fails. He promises to NEVER leave us or abandon us. He is true to his word.

He is working things out for your highest and greatest good. ~Shar

He is …..in the storm.

He is …in the middle of your darkest hour.

He is …in the pressing.

He is …in the molding.

He is …in the breaking.

He is …in crushing.

He is… in the pruning.

He is …in the Season of ugly

He is…. in the Waiting

He is… in it ALL my friend.

Read or listen to the words to this very powerful song… “Take Courage…He is in the Waiting” by Kristene Dimarco

Slow down, take time

Breath in He said

He’d reveal what’s to come

The thoughts in His mind

Always higher than mine

He’ll reveal all to come

Take courage my heart

Stay steadfast my soul

He’s in the waiting

He’s in the waiting

Hold onto your hope

As your triumph unfolds

He’s never failing

He’s never failing

Sing praise my soul

Find strength in joy

Let His Words lead you on

Do not forget His great faithfulness

He’ll finish all He’s begun

So take courage my heart

Stay steadfast my soul

He’s in the waiting

He’s in the waiting

Hold onto your hope

As your triumph unfolds

He’s never failing

He’s never failing

Take courage my heart

Stay steadfast my soul

He’s in the waiting

He’s in the waiting

Hold onto your hope

As your triumph unfolds

He’s never failing

He’s never failing

And You who hold the stars

Who calls them each by name

Will surely keep, Your promise to me

That I will rise, in Your victory

And You who hold the stars

Who calls them each by name

Will surely keep, Your promise to me

That I will rise, in Your victory!

So take courage my heart

Stay steadfast my soul

He’s in the waiting

He’s in the waiting

And hold onto your hope

Watch your triumph unfold

He’s never failing

He’s never failing

So take courage my heart

Stay steadfast my soul

He’s in the waiting

He’s in the waiting

And hold onto your hope

Watch your triumph unfold

He’s never failing

He’s never failing!

He’s in the waiting

He’s in the waiting

He’s in the waiting

He’s in the waiting

He’s in the waiting

He’s in the waiting

Waiting

______________________________________________________________________________

~Still Becoming~

zonnette jackson 6

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